Deciphering corporate lingo

• 'We will do it' means 'You will do it'.
• 'You have done a great job' means 'More work to be given to you'.
• 'We are working on it' means 'We have not yet started working on the same'.
• 'Tomorrow first thing in the morining' means 'Its not getting done... At least not tomorrow!'.
• 'After discussion we will decide - I am very open to views' means ' I have already decided, I will tell you what to do'.
• 'There was a slight miscommunication' means 'We had actually lied'.
• 'Lets call a meeting and discuss' means ' I have no time now, will talk later".
• 'We can always do it' means 'We actually cannot do the same on time'.
• 'we are on the rith track but there needs to be a slight extension of the dealine' means 'The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver on time.'
• 'We had slight differences of opinion' means 'We had actually fought'.
• 'Make a list of the work that you do and let's see how I can help you' means 'Anyway you have to find a way out no help from me'.
• 'You should have told me earlier' means 'Well even if you tole me earlier that would have made hardly any difference!'
• 'We need to find out the real reason' means 'Well I will tell you where your fault is'.
• 'Well... family is important, your leave is always granted. Just ensure that the work is not affected' means ' Well you know ...'
• 'We are a team' means ' I am not the only one to be blamed'.
• 'That's actually a good question' means 'I do not know anything about it'.
• 'all the Best' means 'You are in trouble

What does it means?

• When a GIRL is quiet ... millions of things are running in her mind.
• When a GIRL is not arguing ... she is thinking deeply.
• When a GIRL looks at u with eyes full of questions ... she is wondering how long you will be around.
• When a GIRL answers ' I'm fine ' after a few seconds ... she is not at all fine.
• When a GIRL stares at you she is wondering why you are lying.
• When a GIRL lays on your chest .. she is wishing for you to be hers forever.
• When a GIRL wants to see you everyday... she wants to be pampered
• When a GIRL says ' I love you ' .. she means it.
• When a GIRL says ' I miss you ' .... no one in this world can miss you more than that.
• Life only comes around once make sure u spend it with the right person ....

Find a guy ..

• who calls you beautiful instead of hot.
• who calls you back when you hang up on him.
• who will stay awake just to watch you sleep. Wait for the guy who ... kisses your forehead.
• Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats.
• Who holds your hand in front of his friends.
• Who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you.
• Who turns to his friends and says, ' That's her!! '

Read your fingerprints...

It is already an accepted fact that every single person in the world has a different set of fingerprints. The Chinese have devised a way to read personality & destiny traits by studying the waves and the circles that appear at the tips of everyone's fingers – indeed so convinced are they that in the old days the fingers of prospective daughters-in-law were carefully scrutinized by prominent families to ensure they did not unwittingly welcome women who had fingers that showed alternate circles and waves on their fingers, as it was commonly believed that such women would bring trouble into the family, being particularly difficult to control and usually very aggressive.

In this issue of FSW we bring you some indications of destiny & personality traits based on the circles and waves on the five fingers of each hand. Guys should examine their left hands while women should look at their right hands.

Here are the two different patterns of circles and waves seen on every finger. To make a reading, look at your thumb print first, then your index finger, your middle finger, your ring finger and then your little finger in that order. This is the sequence that offers clues to your destiny & fortunes of your life.

For ease of reference we shall refer to circles as Os and to waves as Ws.

Fingers: OOOOO (all whorls) Means: This person is very confident, has a strong character and a hot temper. He/she is an independent person. The luck of this person changes dramatically in life from one period to the next. The undoing of this person will be his/her hot temper so it is vital that this person must learn to be patient and calm.

Shape: WWWWW (all waves) Means: This person is a straightforward honest person who goes with the flow. The fingers indicate someone very sensitive, who is especially suited to design and creative work. People with these fingerprint patterns tend to be shy and uncomfortable in social situations, so are not suited to work in PR, politics or any kind of work requiring them to meet people.

Shape: OWWWO Means: If you can choose a prestigious working career, you will be very successful. However, you should avoid the tendency to get big-headed and you must never take your career for granted. You should also watch your back, as you tend to attract jealousy into your life and could get betrayed. Always look for long-term benefits.

Shape: OWWOW Means: You will need to work harder during the early days of your career. When you reach middle and older age, you will get recognition and wealth luck. So your life gets better the older you get.

Shape: OWOWW Means: It is vital that you resist the tendency to be narrow-minded in your attitudes and in the way you think and work. Try to be humble and learn as much as possible. This is how you will get influential help that brings you to the peak of your business and career life.

Shape: WOOOO Means: You are a very clear-minded person. As long as you work hard, you are guaranteed to be successful. Even though you tend to be in a hurry, there will be those who help you along. You are also a person with a kind heart.

Shape: OOOOW Means: Because you are kind and have an in-built polite attitude, you will easily get help from older persons and friends. You will enjoy great success in your working life and your only weakness is you don't trust people too easily. This can make you too conservative.

Shape: OOOWW Means: You have a tendency to be bad tempered, and rather quick to judge. This is a shallow attitude and could easily get you onto the wrong path. If you can correct this tendency of yours, you will have great success. The potential is in you, so try to be calm in your approach.

Shape: OWWWW Means: You have good character but can only become really successful in older age. Be prepared to have to work really hard during your younger and middle age periods, but you will become a successful person in older years.

Shape: WOWWW Means: You are very good in the social skills. No matter what industry you are in, you like to take risk and you will always face uncertainty. Be careful as the later years of your life could bring yet more challenges. Take less risk as you get older.

Shape: WWOWW Means: You are a person who has high vision and heavy responsibility. Be careful. Your visions could get you into serious difficulty. Better to stay more grounded, then your life will have greater success.

Shape: WWWOW Means: You are very intelligent and will enjoy a lot of scholastic honours. You will have a smooth life and benefit from wealth luck. If you can work hard, you will become a great and successful person.

Shape: WWWWO Means: You will inherit a business or property from your parents or from an older person. Even though you are a capable person and can be successful in your own business, your tendency towards impatience could get you into a lot of difficulty.

Shape: OOWWW Means: You have a tendency to be proud and snobbish, although deep inside you are a kind-hearted person. Your social skills however need improving. Your relatives tend to take advantage of you.

Shape: WOWWO Means: You are a deep thinking person. At a young age, you are already thinking of your future. You will enjoy a smooth and peaceful life; you will be very happy in your old age.

Shape: WOWOO Means: You are a very sociable person and you enjoy the carefree kind of life going out, partying and clubbing. When you reach middle and older age, you will rely on people to support you. Be warned, if you do not prepare yourself, you might have a hard time during your older years.

Shape: WOWOW Means: You are not an easy person to control or to convince, as you are something of a rebel. If you can stay focused on what you want from life, you will be successful. The problem is that you can be fickle and vague in what you really want from life.

Shape: WWOWO Means: Your whole life is full of ups and downs, successes and failures. However, if you can move steadily step-by-step, you can enjoy a peaceful life as you grow into maturity.

Shape: WWWOO Means: You are very kindhearted person and there will be good people in your life, as you will attract these kinds of people towards you. Work hard and you will easily reap your just rewards. You will definitely become successful.

Shape: OWWOO Means: You will get recognition and become famous. Even though your life appears unstable during your earlier years of working life and you need to work hard in your thirties, when you reach maturity, your life gets better and better.

Shape: WWOOW Means: You are a very capable person, but you tend to lack good judgement. You also tend to start something and then lose interest. Stay focused if you want to succeed.

Shape: OWOOW Means: You are a noble person with a good character. You tend to be very helpful towards colleagues and friends so you are a popular person. Because you can think in-depth and have sensitivity towards others, you will enjoy success in the creative fields.

Shape: OWOWO Means: You are blessed with a fast and formidable intellect. You work very quickly and with great effectiveness. However, your character is very aggressive and people tend to be intimidated by you. If you can correct this trait, you can rise to great heights.

Shape: WWOOO Means: You are a very straightforward person. But your thinking tends to be rather naïve and shallow. Even though your suggestions are good, if you don't think through what you say, you should not be surprised if people tend to ignore your views. Your speech tends to lack power.

Shape: OOWOW Means: You are a high-minded person, able to see and grab opportunities. You are best suited to work in the financial and investment fields. Your luck gets better as you grow older.

Shape: OOWWO Means: You are a very honest and reputable person. You have little urge to get rich or pursue material wealth. But watch it, if you don't know how to take care of yourself, you can easily get conned and taken advantage of by people.

Shape: OOOWO Means: Your social skills are good, so you attract guidance and help from influential people. Many people help you in your rise to prominence, and your luck turns fabulous in later years.

Shape: OOWOO Means: You are a very brave and hardworking person. A lot of people trust you when you are young. However, unless you work at preserving your reputation, you could make enemies on your rise up and find that life becomes harder as you get older.

Shape: OWOOO Means: You are a kindhearted character and easily get along with others. You are not good at doing business, but you are good as a teacher or even as a spiritual master. You can enjoy success in the academic world.

Shape: WOOWW Means: You are reputable and have a peaceful character. So you are definitely someone who can become successful and recognized. However, because of your tendency towards pride, you could end up offending the wrong people.

Shape: WOOWO Means: You are a simple but logical person. If you can focus on the fundamentals of life and adopt a step-by-step approach in your climb up the success ladder and not be too impatient, you will benefit from wealth luck and be honored by people.

Shape: WOOOW Means: You are a straight talking person who is forthright in your approach. You are strong in character, playful but you also easily offend people. But you are also lucky because when you reach middle age, you will rise to a prominent position and your luck really changes for the better

Newton comit sucide...

Once, Newton came to India and watched a few Tamil movies that had his head spinning. He was convinced that all his logic and laws in physics were just a huge pile of junk and apologized for everything he had done.

In the movie of Rajanikanth, Newton was confused to such an extent that he went paranoid.

Here are a few scenes

1. Rajanikanth has a Brain Tumor which, according to the doctors can't be cured and his death is imminent. In one of the fights, our great Rajanikanth is shot in the head. To everybody's surprise, the bullet passes through his ears taking away the tumor along with it and he is cured!
   
   Long Live Rajanikanth!!!
   
2. In another movie, Rajanikanth is confronted with 3 gangsters.Rajanikanth has a gun but unfortunately only one bullet and a knife. Guess, what he does? He throws the knife at the middle gangster? & shoots the bullet towards the knife. The knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces, which kills both the gangsters on each side of the middle gangster & the knife kills the middle one.
   
3. Rajanikanth is chased by a gangster. Rajanikanth has a revolver but no bullets in it. Guess, hat he does. Nah? not even in your remotest imaginations. He waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the gangster shoots,Rajanikanth opens the bullet compartment of his revolver and catches the bullet. Then, he closes the bullet compartment and fires his gun.
   
   Bang... the gangster dies...
   

This was too much for our Newton to take! He was completely shaken and decided to go back. But he happened to see another movie for one last time, and thought that at least one movie would follow his theory of physics.The whole movie goes fine and Newton is happy that all in the world hasn't changed.

Oops, not so fast! The 'climax' finally arrives. Rajanikanth gets to know that the villain is on the other side of a very high wall. So high that Rajanikanth can't jump even if he tries like one of those superman techniques that our heroes normally use. Rajanikanth has to desperately kill the villain because it's the climax.

(Newton Bhai is smiling since it is virtually impossible?) Rajanikanth suddenly pulls two guns from his pockets. He throws one gun in the air and when the gun has reached above the height of the wall, he uses the second gun and shoots at the trigger of the first gun in air. The first gun fires off and the villain is dead. & Newton commits suicide

Test Yourself!!!

Read this question, come up with an answer and then scroll down to the bottom for the result.This is not a trick question, its just testing thyself!

Q. A woman, while at the funeral of her own mother, met this guy whom she did not know. She thought this guy> was amazing, so much her dream guy she believed him to be just that! She fell in love with him right there, but never asked for his number and could not find him. A few days later she killed her sister.

Question: What is her motive in killing her sister?
(Give this some thought before you answer, keep your answer in mind and SCROLL DOWN).















Answer: She was hoping that the guy would appear at the funeral again. If you answered this correctly, you think like a psychopath.

This was a test by a famous American Psychologist used to test if one has the same mentality as a killer.

Many arrested serial killers took part in the test and answered the question correctly.> If you didn't answer the question correctly good for you. If you got the answer correct, please let me know so I can take you off of my email list unless that will tick you off, then> I'll just be extra nice to you from now on.

Be sure to share the test.

Interesting Facts

Thought you may find this of interest.

TWO TOUGH QUESTIONS

Question 1:

If you knew a woman who was pregnant, who had 8 kids already, three who were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis, would you recommend that she have an abortion?

Read the next question before looking at the answer for this one.

Question 2:

It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts. Here are the facts about the three leading candidates.

Candidate A -Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with astrologists.He's had two Mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day.

Candidate B -He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps untilnoon, used opium in college and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening.

Candidate C -He is a decorated war hero. He's a vegetarian, doesn't smoke, drinks an occasional beer and never cheated on his wife.

Which of these candidates would be your Choice?

Decide first, no peeking, then scroll down for the answer.





Candidate A: is Franklin D. Roosevelt.
Candidate B : is Winston Churchill.
Candidate C: is Adolph Hitler.

And, by the way, the answer to the abortion question: If you said yes, you just killed Beethoven.Pretty interesting isn't it?

Makes a person think before judging someone.

Never be afraid to try something new.

Remember:Amateurs built the ArkProfessionals built the Titanic and in case you never saw this one..! .

Can you imagine working for a company that has a little more than 500 employees and has the following statistics:

• 29 have been accused of spousal abuse
• 7 have been arrested for fraud
• 19 have been accused of writing bad checks
• 117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses
• 3 have done time for assault
• 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
• 14 have been arrested on drug related charges
• 8 have been arrested for shoplifting
• 21 are currently defendants in lawsuits
• 84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year

Can you guess which organization this is?

Give up yet?

It's the 535 members of the United States Congress. The same group of idiots that crank out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in line.